The Men Who Have Mostly Female Friends
Few other questions have provoked debates as intense, family dinners as awkward, literature as luridor movies as memorable. Still, the question remains unanswered. Daily experience suggests that non-romantic friendships between males and females are not only possible, but common—men and women live, work, and play side-by-side, and generally seem to be able to avoid spontaneously sleeping together. In order to investigate the viability of truly platonic opposite-sex friendships—a topic that has been explored more on the silver screen than in the science lab—researchers brought 88 pairs of undergraduate opposite-sex friends into…a science lab. Privacy was paramount—for example, imagine the fallout if two friends learned that one—and only one—had unspoken romantic feelings for the other throughout their relationship. In order to ensure honest responses, the researchers not only followed standard protocols regarding anonymity and confidentiality, but also required both friends to agree—verbally, and in front of each other—to refrain from discussing the study, even after they had left the testing facility. These friendship pairs were then separated, and each member of each pair was asked a series of questions related to his or her romantic feelings or lack thereof toward the friend with whom they were taking the study. The results suggest large gender differences in how men and women experience opposite-sex friendships.
All the rage , When Harry Met Sally posed a question that other pop-cultural entities have been trying to answer always since: Can straight men and women really be close friends without their partnership turning into something else? According to The Office , no. According to Lost in Translation , certainly. According to Friends … well, at time no and sometimes yes. Screenwriters allow been preoccupied with this question designed for a long time, and according en route for a new study published in the Journal of Relationships Research , the question is also likely to be on the minds of people whose romantic partners have best friends of the opposite sex. For the analyse, Eletra Gilchrist-Petty, an associate professor of communication arts at the University of Alabama in Huntsville, and Lance Kyle Bennett, a doctoral-degree student at the University of Iowa, recruited people, ranging in age from 18 to 64, who were or had been all the rage a heterosexual relationship with someone who had a different-sex best friend. The possibility of romance between friends of the opposite sex has not a minute ago fascinated writers and directors for decades; it has also been a common topic of study for psychologists after that sociologists.
Tom, 27, first noticed that his friendships were skewing womanward in college. Friendships between men and women are arrange the rise in the U. He attributed the reported discrepancy to the subjectivity of relationships, and concluded so as to an equal percentage of men after that women have platonic friendships. I accredit the difference to typical male hubris. Greif says that the number of men in platonic friendships with women has likely increased since he published Buddy System. The rise of male-female relationships in general has also made way for guys like Tom, whose friends are almost all women.
Friendships add so much spark to our lives—helping us find humor and chance in spells of misfortune, and cheering us on in stretches of carnival and transition. We swap stories above meals, and fill moments in age with laughter and like-mindedness—adding to the family we may or may not have. So what happens when you find yourself attracted to one of your confidantes. Will having sex along with your friend ruin the relationship you built? Some might say that accidental lovemaking with someone familiar provides a safe sexual outlet, while granting equally parties the ability to live generously and unattached. We linked up along with a few experts to disassemble the myriad of risks that lurk after the smokescreen of the elusive friends with benefits dynamic, as well at the same time as some friendly rules to play as a result of. But be warned: your no-strings-attached accord may create more baggage than you think….
Afterwards all, friendships are platonic by characterization, right? Platonic friendship specifically refers en route for friendship between two people who could, in theory, feel attracted to all other. If you experience these feelings and decide to keep what you have, your friendship remains platonic. Friendships fulfill an important social need, after that they can look different for all.